December 6, 2014
Prostitution is one of the oldest professions in the world. It dates back a very long time, at least since the Roman Empire. Women have figured out that men really love their anatomy and will pretty much do anything to enjoy it. It’s no secret that women therefore often have a certain power of control over men. They just do. It’s common to see relationships where the females ‘wear the trousers’, simply because the men are so into them. The person who loves least in a relationship, controls it. Remember that!
Back to prostitution. Getting jobs for women isn’t easy. Gender inequality has been around since humans began to work for a living. Traditionally, most cultures feel that a woman’s domain is the home she lives in. So daily domestic chores like cleaning up, washing clothes/dishes & looking after children is women business. Gender inequality begins from raising children, where boys are educated and taught a trade, whiles girls stay with their mothers & learn to be homemakers. Poverty exists in every society though and the income of men, who are by and large the ‘head of the house, frequently isn’t enough to sustain families. It’s been a normal occurrence for centuries and still is. So females of sexual maturity are sent out to make money the easiest way they can: through prostitution. There also exists child labour, where children work alongside their parents or on their own, in order for more money to come to the family as a whole. Such practice has been and still is common in developing countries.
Prostitution, however, is a global phenomenon. It’s patronized by men who don’t have sex regularly, commonly due to busy work schedules that have to be, in order to make ends meet. It’s not a working class thing alone though, rich people do it too. The affluent call it differently: call girls & escorts. Women in this category charge several hundreds of Pounds Sterling at least, per night. Sex is a commodity and controlled to a large extent by organized crime. Powerful criminals, who are among the wealthy and respected in society, run chains of brothels, motels, hotels, casinos & other commercial organizations that permit paid sex as a ‘value added service’ to their operations. Nonetheless it’s not official, they just look the other way when it happens. The proceeds are high, and the further up the chain of command it goes, the bigger the share is.
Prostitutes are known to be poor, belonging to the working poor of society. Yes, call girls who ‘service’ rich and powerful men earn more, but they’re not the majority. Like taking on many other professions, prostitution is a choice, but when women don’t have enough to eat and feed their families and can’t get jobs because employment is largely reserved for men, a significant number of women, as a last resort, turn to prostitution. There are also drug addicts among prostitutes, who additionally also have an expensive habit to finance: the addiction to hard drugs like Crack, Cocaine, Heroin, Crystal Methamphetamine and other variations. These women spend the little they get on ‘scoring’, which is the process of shooting up drugs through your veins.
Too little is done worldwide to assist prostitutes. They’re looked down upon & insulted for living the harsh lives that they do. What people often fail to realize is that prostitution is closely related to poverty & working poverty. It’s not unusual to find prostitutes who come from broken homes. They never had the blessing of being raised right by loving parents, in a home that secured them and nurtured their ambitions. Instead, they experienced cruel things like being raised by single, abusive, and /or drug-addicted parents. They grew up in crime-riddled neighborhoods, where decent jobs are largely non-existent & the agonizing pain of poverty, which inflicts hunger, starvation, deprivation & indignation, bites hard every day. In those situations, they did the best they could & it often meant crime, because crime is the pervasive form of employment there. Men sell drugs or go into robbery and women resort to prostitution. It’s a reality you don’t wish onto anybody!
I’ve slept with prostitutes before. I didn’t get laid & craved for sex. Being far from perfection, I’m no saint. I patronized prostitution because it was affordable & readily available. I played safely but the risk of getting sexually transmitted diseases and/or HIV/AIDS is ever present therein, regardless of the precautions you take. Many prostitutes keep condoms with them, but getting sex diseases from them is very easy. Drug addicted prostitutes also contend with the risk of getting HIV/AIDS by sharing syringes, needles, knives & other sharp tools they use to take drugs. So prostitution is somewhat a bedrock of sexually transmitted diseases and/or HIV/AIDS.
In my experience with prostitutes, I’ve learned that they’re just people like you and me. They have hopes and fears & and are affected by what goes on in society, like everybody else. They’re down to Earth & normal people… living a f*cked up life. Where there’s life, there’s hope and it could be worse, they could be dead but they fight on every day, like valiant soldiers who refuse to be defeated. Women who work in prostitution shouldn’t be called derogatory names like ho, hooker or bitch. They’re sisters, daughters, mothers, aunties & humans. They deserve respect, regardless of what they do. If you don’t live the life of another person and don’t go through its experiences, how can you have a right to judge that person? You don’t! When you point a finger at someone, you have three fingers pointing back at you. Respect people for who they are: human. And they have just as much right as you to live and be!
I care for prostitutes. I choose to. Here in Lagos, you see ladies as young 16 going into the trade. It’s heart-breaking. Sometimes when I look at them and they look back, I see the pain in their eyes. They look at me, asking why they must live this hardship, with their look. To succeed in this world, you by and large have to come from a sheltered upbringing, a home. Yes, there are people who made it from rags to riches but they’re few and far apart. The reality is that the vast majority of people who don’t come from homes and/or were born in and live in poor, crime-riddled neighborhoods, don’t make it successful in life. They succumb to a life of crime, vices and prostitution. So you who is reading this, though we’re different from each other, we in actual fact belong to the privileged of the world. We’re educated, skilled, were born and raised in homes by parents/guardians who more commonly than not cared about us and ’til this day, we STILL live in homes! We are the fortunate in the world because the vast majority of people in the world are poor and exposed to crime. We can therefore not imagine what that reality is like. We therefore also don’t have the right to criticize them because we simply would not know what we’re talking about, simply because we never went through it and are STILL not going through it. Success in this world is living in a home, eating regularly & having a legitimate source of income. Most people just don’t do that!
If governments around the world can afford to spend billions of Pound Sterling for ‘recreational/leisure activities’, like the World Cup, the Olympics & national/continental & international tournaments in other sports, at least every year, then they can also easily develop and fund programs for the rehabilitation of prostitutes! Even powerful politicians like Italy’s Berlusconi patronize prostitution with their Bunga Bunga sex parties! So everyone takes advantage of it but nobody wants to fix it. Typical!
If you help prostitutes, you help families because women who are empowered, empower their own families. Empowered families create prosperous communities, where crime is low and socio-economic development high. Help prostitutes! Care for them! They’re people just like you and me and are not any less. They never were and will never be!
This article is dedicated to all prostitutes, call girls, escorts and sex workers around the world, who commonly have to live through far more hardship in society than any other demographic. Despite their miseries, my heart goes out to them!
Recommended further reading:
April 16, 2014
Because women can be penetrated, they’re raped. Females are only seen as sex objects by low-minded individuals. A woman’s dignity is her virtue. When you force her to have sex with you, you take that virtue away. What happens is that it occurs as a shock: the woman who was in control of herself, now got that control violently taken away from her and her uncompromised status derogatorily decided upon.
All in the name of sex. Getting laid feels so good that guys go out of their way to get it. The perv on a mission. Whatever it takes to get some booty. How can you have sex with a girl without her permission? You think she’s weak ’cause she can’t hit back? Because every guy is averagely stronger. Do women have to learn self-defense now? If I had a daughter, I’d have her learn it. I don’t know martial arts but she’d be able to kick my butt.
We live in savage times now in that every 40 seconds, a woman in America gets raped. Just ask the Feds (1). For a woman to get raped, it’s like a house of cards collapsing, only that it’s with real bricks of a skyscraper. All the thousands of tonnes crashing down like the World Trade Center on you instead of on the ground. In that moment, the woman loses her mind. She gets a whole part of her psyche viciously ripped out with the intensity of a hundred furious after burners. Am I beginning to make sense? To the rape victim, I’m sure I am.
To write this is difficult, but to omit it is even worse. How can we not talk about this when so many are affected? An increasing number of young women get raped during their tertiary education (2). At a time they’re supposed to be finding themselves as adults. Now instead of being healthy ones, they become psychologically damaged adults, dependent on the support of others to successfully get out of their hell on Earth. This costs the American taxpayer over a hundred billion Dollars every year (3). What an amount to pay for in these austerity-rife times. Isn’t America reputed to be the greatest country in the world? I thought they’re the world’s most powerful nation. What primitivity indeed plagues such a leader in this supposedly modern 21st century.
Rapists ought to be given life imprisonment. It’s only fair for in turn having destroyed a woman’s psyche for life. The perpetrators ought to suffer for the rest of their lives, too. Sex awareness should be introduced in and run from primary school. Children ought to be taught that a female must never be raped. When it’s repeated all the way to university, you have less rapists, bent on ruining women’s lives. There’s nothing manly about rape. If a guy can’t get a woman to have sex, with his charisma, he’s got issues with his (inferior) masculinity.
When women are raped, they lose all sense of intimacy of a relationship. A simple hug can be terrifying over not knowing where it’s going to lead, even with the best of intentions. Rape victims have problems trusting men because it’s men who predominantly rape them. It takes years of counselling to get rape victims to a socially normal status again. Rape conditions teenage boys the wrong thing: that they can’t get sex the normal way, they can get it violently. Rape teaches teenage girls to stay away from sex because it’s bad. This is not true, but in innately protecting themselves, they look down upon it anyway. What do we have to do to abolish rape?
First of all, we have to have a women supporting police force & judiciary system. The majority of rape incidents go unreported to the authorities. Rape is one of the mot under-reported crimes in America (4). We need a police force that encourages victims to speak out and is kept safe from retribution. A justice system that stands with rape victims is needed. Tougher penalties for offenders have to be imposed. When men get the picture that rape i equal to a death sentence, they’ll stop more. Another requirement is the healthcare system. Too few women get the medical attention they need, after experiencing rape (5).
People who rape have no reason to. There’s never a good reason to rape. Rapists are degenerates & low lives who stoop to the level of twisted monster out of hell. You want to know what hell is? Go ask a woman who’s been raped. It’s a living nightmare that doesn’t stop, no matter how much you try to forget it. They say to get over pain, you have to accept it. Well that’s pretty hard when you’re dealing with rape. How do you accept it? All that grunting in delight and tormenting thrusts of the criminal. You have to go through that scene over and over again, just to get over it.
I sympathize with rape victims. I’m a man but I’m ashamed that men rape. It’s one of the realities I’m not happy about. This article is dedicated to all female who ever had the great misfortune of being raped. I can’t help much but at least I care. And that to the isolated rape victims in despair means something. The world isn’t all that bad: there are still some good people out there. So don’t lose hope. As hopeless as your situation seems. God watches us all and nobody gets away from him. And over time, wounds do heal as well.
Rape torments the soul. It puts the victim at risk of sexually transmitted diseases. Having been raped means living a life where you’re constantly crying inside, to one degree or another. Rape is barbaric. It classifies the rapist as the lowest of lows. Sex in itself is an experience. Rape takes that experience away. Nothing good can ever come from rape. There is no happy ending. The scene of the incident repeats itself in the mind forever. The worst that can happen is pregnancy by rape. To always be reminded of the rapist when looking at his conceived child is a horrible ordeal. The babies though are part of the mother too, so some women keep them. Others commit abortion. In a case like this, I can’t give my objection.
Rape results in 32000 pregnancies yearly (6). A child is meant to be conceived in love and not terror. A woman should never know to lose power over her own body by rape. It makes her feel violated to the extreme. She feels helpless and that reality tears her apart because she can’t fight it and it consumes her mercilessly. This blog is generally dedicated to female victims of gender inequality, the largest group suffering from the crime. Every raped woman still has hope, though. Time strengthens them and re-calibrates their vision. May raped girls and women see only blessings, for they truly deserve it.
(1) A World Without Rape http://aworldwithoutrape.org
(2) United States Department of Justice study http://www.cops.usdoj.gov/pdf/e03021472.pdf
(3) A World Without Rape http://aworldwithoutrape.org
(4) Rape & Sexual Assault, Dean G. Kilpatrick (Ph.D.) https://www.musc.edu/vawprevention/research/sa.shtml
(5) Rape & Sexual Assault, Dean G. Kilpatrick (Ph.D.) https://www.musc.edu/vawprevention/research/sa.shtml
(6) Washington Post, 13th June 2013 http://wapo.st/Qq6IhT
Wikipedia – Rape http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rape
Rape Trauma Services http://www.rapetraumaservices.org/rape-sexual-assault.html
October 12, 2013
In Sub-Saharan Africa, jobs are scarce. Those who have it, clutch onto it and those who don’t, suffer daily to get it. It’s a man’s world out here and getting by as a man is hard enough. What is it like then for females?
Near absolute gender inequality ensures the fewest are employed. Often the work that are available to women, are underpaid and of low quality. This doesn’t just create a glass ceiling, but an entire floor between male and female workers.
The reality facing youths is that getting prepared for a career is daunting task. There aren’t enough places open for undergraduates at university, as there are far more high school leavers who apply. A significant amount of unemployment is already created in this demographic. Often, the average 3 or 4 year period of studying for a degree is extended by at least half the study time, due to strikes of higher education lecturers who battle government yearly over insufficient salaries. The students become older but rarely take on life and/or transferable skills in the forced abstention. When they do graduate, the fact is that employers don’t seek fresh graduates but workers who have experience in one job or another. Many graduates move back in their parents’ home as a result and simply watch as life passes them by. They become restless and take things into their own hands: they either resort to crime or prostitute themselves softly, by courting people with disposable income.
Sugar daddies are older men who date younger women strictly for sexual benefits. They don’t care about their sex partners, they only pamper them enough to get laid, regularly. The young women who give it up are in their prime youth, the phase in their lives where they can be the most productive. Succumbing to the way things are though, they swallow their pride and accept a form of sexual enslavement.
It’s general Black African culture to be conservative about things regarding sex and public affection. It’s normal in Africa to see married couples not holding hands. Because nothing is said about it, a lot is assumed about matters relating to love and sex. Ignorance is widespread in both educated and uneducated people concerning sex. Sex education isn’t implemented in high school curriculum so teenagers learn about sex the hard way: trying it out for themselves without any guidance or insight. HIV and sex-related diseases are thus rampantly passed on between sex partners, who enjoy ‘trying out’ new partners regularly. There exist many people who prefer having raw sex, without the use of a condom. They say it feels better and it does, but it also makes them completely vulnerable to sex diseases. Since they have the money, they have their way with their money-desperate lovers. All types of diseases are thereby passed on without the receiver realizing it. By the time the symptoms show, it’s already too late and permanent damage usually follows.
The most unfortunate aspect of the nightmare is that jobless young women often intend to get pregnant from their sugar daddies, to get the easiest form of self-sufficiency: being a wife! Therefore, they willingly throw themselves in harm’s way, just to finally make it out of the family nest and be part of the rest of the world. It’s common however to see young women abandoned on their own, while being pregnant. Sugar daddies often leave once it gets sticky. They refuse to accept the babies as their own and move on to other women, eager to buy into their crap. Loads of women have been mistreated this way. It’s made an informal rule in Nigerian society, for example, to have any couple that has a pregnancy to marry. Not observing this rule concludes in a violent backlash from the young mother’s family.
Denying babies isn’t a phenomenon specific to developing countries as it is prevalent in developed countries as well. Lack of enlightenment produces a myriad of problems young women go through to no fault of their own. They can’t really be blamed for wanting to become pregnant to get ahead, in the face of dire poverty and stark desperation. What needs to be done is governments and community leaders/institutions such as schools and universities need to implement sex education and HIV/AIDS awareness in their curriculum to foster more people who are conscious of their sexual health and risks facing it. Exploiting a female because you want sex is pretty low. You can do so much better with your time like doing what you love and then making a vocation of it. Women aren’t sex objects. They’re to be gratified as infinitely more. Leaving a woman in pain of being used by another man is not fulfilling your civic duties as a man or as a people. Young women need all the help they can get. It’s a rough world out there and many girls get used unscrupulously. Give a female a hand and show her there’s still hope in the world. You may be the beginning of her long deserved recovery.
Recommended further reading: Wikipedia – Teen Pregnancy
October 16, 2011
Mandy is a career-minded, driven, intelligent & ambitious young woman, in her late twenties. She’s highly educated, hard-working & tenacious. Her track record is intimidating: She consistently outperforms her older colleagues employed longer than her & isn’t afraid to boldly be the best. Not easy to beat as she rarely takes no for an answer. She’s turns over tens of millions for her company annually & jumps to every new challenge. She’s a go-getter. She’s vying for the top. She’s a flea in an empty, lid-covered glass.
In her eight years of working for a major blue-chip organization listed in the top 20 of Fortune 500 companies, she’s trained over 40 interns & junior staff, retained 2 of them for her own team, been instrumental to the subsequent impressive performances of 30 of them & has ensured a fast track promotional program for one of the them to join the handful of business intelligence analysts, in the private equities wing of the multinational group. She oversees a few billions in customized investment vehicles for an aristocrat dynasty in Northern Europe. Over the past four years, she has grown their profit by 35%. She’s the dog’s bollocks. If you gave her a buck to invest, she would ask you in what denominations you would want to receive the five-thousand-fold increase the week after. She is top of her league & everybody knows it. Mandy is the business.
For the past four years, she’s been a capacity building mill. Batch after batch of newbie, ivy league college grads, she’s been training, to the enormous growth/performance of her division. When the in-house, elite training program started, she was picked to run it, from a short list of three: 2 men & herself. She didn’t have to do much to get the opportunity in the first place; she had been doing way too much ever since she started to show the firm she was nothing less than perfect to become the next CEO. And much to the Board’s dislike. She trains young professionals with heart, complete devotion & earns a healthy bonus from every training installment, that grows the happiness of her euphoric bank account. Mandy is eight months away from turning 30. She’s already made enough money to retire into a quiet, suburban lifestyle for the rest of her life. But she is a wealthy slave. As powerhouse as she is to the company, she has no power, just enormous capabilities. And they’re driving her mad!
Mandy represents a movement, a dangerous movement to the senior technocrat custodians of Old Money. Wherever the Board works, they implement their traditions/culture underpinning their values/beliefs of work & reward, with them. If they go into e.g. mining, the company will be built in a hierarchical order that complements the way they lead businesses: totalitarian, colonialist, chauvinistic & heartless. The top one percent of Mandy’s multinational group are nonetheless well attuned to our time & perform to pinnacle standards every year. Even when they have a bad year & miss their profit margin, they’re still in the top 10 of best industry earners. Mandy is denied her right to take part in that; to excel in an extremely high level of management, leading & performing, because for the past three years, 20% of the total number of trainees she’s developed have been placed on promotional paths, that lead to that echelon – and they’re all men.
Mandy’s vexed! She’s realized that she’s reached the point where she’s about as good as she’ll ever get. And that’s for the rest of her career. It doesn’t matter if she gradually notices more workers rising to the top whom she she knows aren’t up to her caliber; they fit the profile & as far Mandy is concerned, from the Board’s perspective, she’s payed her dues & is given her reward: A fat paycheck, time & time again – just no breakthrough! Indignation; it’s happens to the most of us. It happens to the best of us. It happens to women! From the outside looking in, Mandy hasn’t got much to complain about. She owns a new S5, a lush 2-bedroom apartment, has the looks to get any man she wants but is waiting to fall in love & can afford a Black Card (if she only eats & works for the rest of her life). She does better than most & that’s not just women! So, what could she possibly be missing? Isn’t money everything? In a retail, consumerist world, yes! Just not in the world of movers & shakers, who have the real power to effect things & set standards. Isn’t that what we’re all about? To blossom in our full potential? And money by itself doesn’t buy that. That’s why top athletes leave inflated contracts, in the hunt for that missing championship medal they haven’t earned yet. That’s why actors choose ground-breaking roles over blockbusters because they’re looking for that accomplishments (the really good ones anyway). That’s why Wall Street brokers quit to open small restaurants & Mandy is getting partial-psychological, postmortem blues with her depression about the invisible atrocity that’s preventing her from soaring any higher: The Glass Ceiling!
The above writing is a work of fiction, based on real issues, to paint a picture of the concealed extent, to which women are ruthlessly exploited in the ‘modern’ day. Any resemblance of the lead character to any person living or dead, is purely coincidental.