Sexual Child Abuse: Grooming, Incest, Paedophilia

September 16, 2011

As Featured On EzineArticles

Please be warned what you’re about to read is NOT for frail nerves!

If I had a daughter, she would be the most precious gift of my life. If I had a daughter, I would have already found one such gift: In her mother. If I were blessed with a daughter, I would do everything I could to protect her. And then, I would do a little more. What I’ve learned in this world, in almost three decades, is that this world is a cut-throat world. I’ve had my life threatened on numerous occasions, since I was a child. I’m lucky to be alive today, my life is a gift! There’s no doubt about that. The most important thing I’ve learnt is that you can only survive & succeed in this world, if you become strong. Success means different things to people, to me success is being alive & healthy & living to see your kids do the same.

If I had a daughter, truth be told, I would probably be ridiculously soft with her. I’m an emotional guy & she would figure it out sooner than later, in her female cunning intelligence. And so, being tough on her – strict & disciplinarian, would likely be delegated to her mother. Since I know what the world is like though, I would insist she learn what I tell her, unfailingly, because her lessons would be the difference between her making it in life or failing. I have been defeated many times in my life; the difference is I never stopped going.

And so, strength would be the hallmark, my part in her upbringing, would be based on. Strength in intelligence, strength in experience, strength in wits & strength in emotions. I realize parenting is a ridiculously tough job but that would be my agenda. I’m sure it is always easier to think about parenting than it is to practise it. Awesome! If I had a daughter, I’d constantly tell her I love her… & be the type of parent, most kids would hate to be around, at school. I would be amazed by her, by everything she does & everything about her, every day.

Now, this is my prediction of becoming a dad. It would probably also be the scariest thing in my life. I would be terrified every day, deep down inside, because I’d know that I have this unbelievable, incredible gift in my life,… within this god-forsaken-like place of a planet we call the world! =) A world in which little girls get fondled by older men, all the time, every minute around the clock, all across the world. And that’s just part of the psychotic foreplay. I’d wish I could wish to have all my parents’ upbringing skills & would try to become their listening/obedient son I haven’t been particularly known for, to raise my daughter successfully, through the maze of life & death in the world. Yeah, that would sound like me!

I once heard the most important part of a girl’s life is her father. Kind of funny when you think that both parents are actually equally important to a child, but basically, having a dad makes a world of positive difference to a girl’s life. She gets her balance from her dad; her ability to relate with males, respectfully; she learns how to balance her natural femininity & not let all her oestrogen out of control ( I seriously DON’T mean any offence to females at all! I’m a guy & guys aren’t exactly popular for their communication skills!). She puts all her trust in her father & expects him to always have her best interest & safety at heart. This ‘naivete’, this is a girl simply being a daughter to her dad. A girl talks to her dad like they’re the best friends in the world. She tells him everything & listens to everything he has to say, in awe & amazement. She finds him the most interesting man in the world ever & is forever intrigued by him & his behaviour. A girl is open with her love for her dad, she gives him big kisses & big hugs. She sleeps in his arms, plays with him, holds his hand, looks into his eyes, laughs with him, laughs at him, brushes her teeth with him & whatever else a girl & her father do in their home.

Millions of girls worldwide have incomprehensibly regretted these natural forms of behaviour & live in a psychologically demented world; a parallel reality that is so sick & deranged that they cannot make sense of it – because nobody can. They are broken people, for whom exhibiting the natural ways of being loving daughters to their fathers, involuntarily initiated them to having demonic practices & atrocities committed to them: Grotesque crimes exercised on their bodies in forms of sexual molestation, rape & the associated psychological maiming. The very innate behaviour that these girls develop, to grow healthy & balanced emotionally, victimized them violently to a life of profound anguish & terror. They are kids JUST LIKE the others. No different! But unlike the overwhelming majority of girls in general, who grow up normally, these helpless children end up traumatized, terrified, schizophrenic, paranoid, insane and/or absolutely tormented, to give you a basic understanding (or how else would you describe a girl who’s experienced incest?). They physically live in the conscious world with the rest of us, but our reality obviously doesn’t make any sense to them or they wouldn’t be raped as they are. Having started out as normal kids, the way nature intended them to be, makes no difference. So, they’re smashed into their parallel reality of absolute horror, that’s simultaneous to yet completely disconnected from ‘our’ reality because they’re over there on their own. All because they are innocent victims of incest & sexual child abuse. That is a glimpse into the state of mind of a girl who has been & continues to be raped repetitively by her father. By the one person, she trusted more than anything in the world!

I call these acts demonic practices & atrocities committed to them, simply because – some events are too horrible to be classified as crimes. When a shop is robbed, that’s a crime. When the financial sector orchestrates a great, global recession, that’s a crime. When it gets away with it, that’s a crime. When the leadership of a country refuse to account for the needs of their people & serve themselves & powerful, mega-corporations instead, that’s also a crime. Although, they may feel like atrocities to their victims & it’s debatable whether or not their perpetrators are demonic, they’re frankly speaking, all examples of crime. When a girl, however, has all the existing norms of human existence, completely transgressed through sexual violence by her inner-most, sacred, trusted & loved circle – her own family, such events carry an unmistakably far darker essence than e.g. cyber crime or contract inflations. I only agree with them still being labelled as crimes, to legally pursue & severely punish the culprits who ruin the lives of these once bright & hopeful girls. If I had a daughter & she were raped, I don’t even know what I would do myself. I’m probably blanking it out now, to subconsciously spare myself from entering a frame of mind that would be unacceptable expressing from, for the remainder of the article.

Let’s go into a perpetrator’s mind. Let’s conceptualize a sick, demented, psychotic man who’s guilty of performing sexual crimes on his daughter.

It starts with grooming, I suppose. But before that, let me take it even further; all the way to the very beginning: Let’s start the frame from when she was born!

OK, so his wife is in bed with her legs spread, blood everywhere & she’s just given birth. A, breathtakingly beautiful baby girl. The doctor just passed the wrapped up baby to her dad. The dad, he’s over the moon! In his crazy, latent, mental illness, he stares at his child. Holding her gently, stroking her tiny face, loving every bit of it. Not going too far, so as not to give away anything. OK, so then the couple goes home with the baby. It’s the first couple of days & all they can do is pay attention to her 24/7. Then he takes the time to take care of her. He changes her diaper, bathes her, cuddles with her, tucks her in her cradle etc. With ever so much loving care! When the baby’s mother isn’t around, he probably fondles her between her legs. Sick, I know! So, then the child grows up, the years pass by & daddy has gotten really close to the little girl! They play, fool around & joke loads with each other. She’s like the best friend he never had & he’s like the closest, overall buddy she loves being around of. Friends for life! And then, a little longer.

It’s hard for me to continue this part, but as they live with each other, family-style, the dad starts to pat her in places he really shouldn’t, a bit more. He stays with her in her room when she’s undressing, more often, even though he knows he probably shouldn’t. But then again, maybe not. He makes her sit on his lap a lot more, whenever they hang out & watch TV. She’s growing up & is becoming increasingly plunged into a life of paternal perversion on herself & instinctively cannot figure out how to get out of this situation, because she instinctively knows something’s not right! I mean, it’s not really easy: It’s her DAD after all, you know? He perhaps gets the little voices talking in his head as well, that tell him everything he’s doing is bad, but he doesn’t care. Maybe they don’t exist in his head! He’s her father, he tells himself. No one has the right to tell him how to raise his daughter! And so, he just responds like an everyday sociopath: He acts like nothing ever happened!

Grooming is a big thing in courting, as a paedophile. He must have been telling her she’s beautiful all the time! He must have put her mother’s lipstick on her & put make up on her & encouraged her take her clothes off, down to her underwear & walk around the house, in her mother’s stilettos. He must have been shaking his hips in amusement with her, when teaching her how to walk like a model. Then he told her how hot she’s becoming & how she’ll make all the boys like her & be someone really popular in school – despite being a minor. It’s called brainwashing. If the mind is regularly fed something long enough, it starts to believe it. Where do you think the phrase ‘ Fake it to make it’ comes from? You keep on listening to it, trying to apply it. It takes about 30 days to adopt a habit; her dad’s been conditioning her since birth! The girl still loves & trusts her daddy, but she can’t make out why she’s made to do these things. And she doesn’t feel all that comfortable when he stays with her in her room, when she undresses, or has a bath. She feels funny when he even stays with her in the rest room, when she has to wee-wee. It’s been going all her life, but recently it’s been becoming a lot more. She doesn’t really tell mommy because, well, let’s face it: She’s afraid. She feels guilt even though it’s not her fault! Something bad may happen or she won’t know what may happen & doesn’t want that either. She’s only 8 years old & in her infant psychology, doesn’t know how to deal with her shame! She feels it, but can’t explain what it is. It just makes her increasingly uncomfortable around her dad now & she’s beginning to suffer… in silence!

One day, it’s all ready to go. This is it! She drops off from the school bus & her dad waits in the living room for her to walk in. He kisses her & takes off her school bag & tells her to go to her bathroom to change. She obeys him, goes into the bathroom, begins to pull off her shirt & BAM! Her dad bursts in, slams the door & shoves her over the table, holding her face down as he begins loosening his belt to take off his jeans. She doesn’t know what is all of the sudden happening in the few split seconds so screams, but he slaps her, over & over again until she stops out of unbearable pain & just cries instead. He’s already excited & his pants are over his knees. He grabs her rear & tears her pink & white, butterfly-decorated children pants down & thrusts himself into her: HARD! He doesn’t fit for her underdeveloped reproductive organ, so he crouches down some more, to her hip level & then pulls her rear to himself as he clutches onto her hips with death-grip! She screams! She squeals! She can’t believe what’s happening, doesn’t know how to make it stop, wants to disappear from the situation immediately, can’t stand the incredibly sharp & flesh-ripping PAIN that she’s experiencing & is thinking at least a dozen other thoughts at the same time, yet can’t do anything about any of them & knows she has to endure the nightmare & cries even more in realization of that. She’s a girl! She’s 8 YEARS OLD! She is being raped by her father, who all her life she thought was the one person who would always be by her side. The one who would always support her & no matter what… always give her unconditional love! No she’s living out his dark fantasy. He’s ritualizing her to appease his twisted fetishes. He doesn’t care if he’s destroying the innocence she’s got down there. He’s unconcerned that she feels so tight that he has to thrust violently & forcefully, to experience her, from the inside. This is his daughter! He has the right to do whatever he wants to with her, at his discretion. No one has the right to tell him how to raise his daughter!

It is in such mentality that much of the world governs its citizens, in that incest is vaguely defined in legal terms & many crimes thereof are governmentally swept under the carpet. It is a crime like domestic violence, that many police authorities around the world feel is a domestic affair & therefore out of their jurisdiction. The problem with activists boldly speaking about & against it, like myself, is that they’re often suspected of being paedophiles themselves. I bet some of you think I’m a deranged man for having walked you through a grooming & subsequent rape process, myself. Be honest! You won’t get an apology from me though. Why should I apologize for graphically visualizing one such incest-rape scene when, as you’re reading this, thousands of its kind are happening to some poor girls around the planet? Oh dear! I’m really sorry for bringing to your awareness the exact horror a little girl experienced earlier today, from whom she thought she knew the most… not!

I’m being this provocative to drive a point home: Now that you’ve been in someone else’s place, campaign against it! Every… Single… Person… Helps! You can only control your actions, so what would it be like if a few hundred web surfers, just like you, decided to campaign against incest & resolved to keep it at the forefront of their thoughts from now on? How many people would you plan to get involved? How many do you think the couple of hundred out there would advise to take a stand too? See how many you’ve already become? The individual always has more power socially, than the person is aware of. People can engage more against evil than they think is possible, especially in this time of the ‘shrinking world’ globalization phenomenon through ICTs & the Internet. But it always has to start with that one person… who thinks (s)he is the only one who’s making that decision today – while being completely unaware of others, doing the same in their own homes!

The really sad part about incest is that all over the world, it’s vaguely written in law. Perpetrators are thus given universal approval to continue in their detestable ways, not really having to worry about much. I can only think of about 5 countries, mostly in western Europe that significantly punish incest. We’re so proud to be of the 21st century; to have become so modern & moulded into a ‘global village’. Yet we can’t even bring ourselves to protect our children from sexual crimes/predatory. What a great stride. I’m so glad I to be living in this time. We made it out of the Stone Age; Whoop Whoop! I shouldn’t work myself too much about it, though. With global gender inequality being so horrific & deeply-embedded across societies, at least it still keeps me in business! And that’s the despicable part of it: That as long as children get raped by family members & die psychologically from it, people like me remain in employment! Go figure! I really should get another job but then who would help all these kids? You don’t have to be a believer to approve it; it’s the nature of the beast!

Girls grow up in very troubling times, these days. Here’s a small example: “In Brazil, incest is considered any kind of sexual interaction between two blood related humans being. It has no criminal punishment if the involved are over the age of 14, capable of acting upon their legal rights, and that consent means that the relationship is absent of any kind of coercion or fraud. An uncle or aunt is allowed to have a relationship with a nephew or niece provided that they have a health check. [Wikipedia.org contributors (2011). Laws Regarding Incest, Wikipedia.org]

A number of countries don’t even have explicit laws against incest, partly because courting girl-children is a cultural custom. Just think of all the under-age, forced marriages going on across developing countries, most notably Africa & the Middle East. In my country, there’s a governor who got himself of Northern African girl as his wife last year: The girl is under 13! There was a furore in the media, civil societies ran amok, and then the dust settled down & in the country, it was back to business as usual. Like nothing ever happened! But what happens with that poor girl for the rest of her life, well, she’s on her own… with that old man. THAT is the plight of the girl victimized of paedophilia! How long will it take before numerous millions of tormented girls, suffering, crying profusely, screaming to the heavens & repeatedly breaking down psychologically – ALONE, get anyone/anything to finally save them at last from their God-forsaken, living nightmare? A year? Two years? You’re right, I was only joking – more like NEVER!

Oops… am I being too cynical? OK, let me be more POLITICALLY CORRECT: How about 30 – 40 years? Is that more feasible? Great, we have a consensus then. What wonderful news because in less than half a century, all acts of sexual child abuse will be banished forever! It’s not really that bad because a few decades is still better than never. From whose perspective are we talking here: The political ‘humanitarians’ or the (consistently) raped, girl-victims? Because to them, those few decades might as well be NEVER! Some of them will NEVER make it & would have died in sexual child abuse. Some of them would have become so psychologically deep-charred, steam-cooked & fried up, they might as well will be called dead because they’ll have no measure of human dignity left to live with some quality of life. Some of them would have committed suicide, taken their own lives, that they so very much cherished when they were infants, if they had somewhat of a childhood worth remembering. Some of them, well let’s face it, you can never really truly expel crime from Earth can you? You can never really get rid of the demonic side of human nature that propels us to do these dastardly crimes, when they are committed: You know, waging wars; not responding to famines like the current one in which the number of people who could die is more than TWICE the amount of Jews who got killed in the second world war but who cares, landslides, mudslides, monsoons, floods, droughts etc, particularly in developing countries; you know, the usual stuff! So, some of these girls would just be taken ‘underground’, re-married elsewhere perhaps, moved to different locations, basically just remain in sexual child slavery. Because that’s what it is, there’s no other term for it: If an under-age girl is forced to engage in sexual acts of all documented & undocumented obscenities & not saved from such existence, AS IS HER HUMAN RIGHT, her psychology gets cluster-bombed, multiple times repetitively, throughout each & every single, horrifying, excruciatingly-long, 24 hour set of the rest of her life. Or how else would you describe a girl experiencing sexual abuse?

My heart goes out to all girls who go through incest & other acts of sexual violence. It took a lot for me to write this article, it wasn’t easy – talking about something involving little humans who haven’t made the life experiences yet to distinguish right from wrong. They experience it but their wrong becomes a right & their right, wrong! Absolutely wrong! Because nothing they ever thought that would make a balance & seem acceptable would ever be carried out such way. On the contrary, everything of their pre-perceived ‘norm’ just backlashed in a terrifyingly violent ricochet of pure insanity; spiralling out of control over pretty much the rest of their years! Is that a life you wish for them?

If perpetrators of sexual child abuse, all kinds of it, could in a flash, just rewind to when they were kids, little boys, then witness an event in which their mothers were brutally gang-raped, by a horde of despicable, older men, one after the other, in turns, and the little boys just stood there, staring their mothers in the eye, while their mothers would keep a brave face & tell them ‘It’s OK baby! Everything is going to be fine!’ in writhing pain, and in a moment, they could make all those degenerate rapists suffer & be harshly punished for their crimes, would they do it or keep on watching, knowing they’d be seeing themselves in those deranged, older men and therefore refrain from taking action? Because every girl suffering from sexual child abuse today is pictured in those mothers: Someone’s MOTHER! She just hasn’t grown up to become a woman yet, if she’s lucky.

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